What A Moron

31 Mar

“You know what really grinds my gears?”

My friend in a sorority at another school told me this story, and I wanted to DIE I laughed so hard, enjoy! (Adapted to text by me)

My friend’s sorority just initiated 34 wonderful new members into her sorority this passed Sunday, and it was definitely a joyous occasion! One particular member however, likes to complain–a lot. At one point, she “felt uncomfortable” coming to the house, for what reason, no one knows. It’s not like they did anything to upset their new members, which is reflected in the fact that she was the only one who was  feeling uncomforted. Once initiation happened, all the sisters figured this annoying and unnecessary whining and complaining would come to a screeching halt, but it was just the opposite. This moron put the car in reverse and ran over at least 10 animals on her way back, and then managed to hit a HUGE tree while in drive. You see, this particular girl decided to create a survey using online survey software, and sent it to her entire new member class–all 34 of them. She plans to take the answers from this “anonymous” survey and implement them into next year’s new member period. Little does she know, she has absolutely NO say in this, and if enough people didn’t hate her before, she now has her new member class on the “I hate you” side of things, so that definitely did not help her cause. Not only will no one listen to what she has to say, but all of her new member class is pretty much refusing to take the survey, or answering the questions in the opposite way she hoped for. Not to mention, their new member class–well, everyone except this girl–realizes that they are sisters now, and did the right thing by showing the majority of sisters the message thread in which this girl sent the survey to them on, wait for it, wait for it…FACEBOOK. Ha! Moron! Honestly, email would have been a little less 7th grade and a little more high school, but no, she’s stuck in middle school. Members of her new member class have already backlashed at her stating their utter disbelief and disappointment at her stupidity and moronic ways. Did I mention she’s a moron?

Listen up, here’s some advice from A major Ditk for all you sorority girls out there– if you’re going to try and backstab the house that YOU ARE ALREADY A PART OF, just do yourself a favor and leave. We don’t want you here, we don’t need you here, and we certainly don’t want to deal with all of the shenanigans that you may bring in years to come, because if this is any indication, you’re NOT a promising member and definitely do not hold the values of our sorority, like you claim to do sooooo well. FALSE FALSE FALSE. If you somehow find yourself reading this, you will know who you are, you should apologize to the chapter or just go, because you’ve already damaged enough. What are you going to do? Go to someone and complain? Who are they going to believe? One new member, or 33 new members plus 100+ previously initiated sisters–you decide, because the choice is yours.

Thanks to my friend for this amazingly entertaining story. Keep me posted so I can keep my “AdDitks” informed!

In the words of JoJo, “get out, leave, right now”

-A DITK

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